2005, Going On 2006

2005 started off on a sad note with the death of my 86 year old mother in law in early January. She went into a nursing home after a stroke left her paralyzed a number of years ago. It wasn't an ideal situation but she and the family had adjusted. She became very ill at the end of 2004 and could never gather the strength to recover. At 86 she had, had a long though not always happy life. May she rest in peace.

In February we decided to take on a new venture. We decided to take a space in a antique mall in order to sell some of our old books and collectibles. We were a little nervous about taking on yet another rental expense, but we have a lot of stuff we've collected over the years. Since we are incorrigible pack rats and we can't pass up a bargain, we just continue to accumulate in spite of our own better judgment.

Although we sell collectible books and other objects on eBay pretty much full time, there are certain items and certain types of books which simply will sell better in a mall setting where people can see and touch the items. So we were looking for a mall space, and coincidentally, a woman came to me to have a book repaired, and she was a co owner of a pretty nice antique mall not far from our studio. We immediately liked her straight forward honest personality, and her sensible approach to the business. She was obviously knowledgeable about the antiques and collectibles market, and her obvious intelligence and liberal politics helped persuade us to try a space in that mall.

We haven't regretted that decision for one single minute. We've sold enough to meet our original expectations and more. We've met some really nice people, other dealers, and all of them understand the craziness of the collecting disease. I'd wondered if I might be jumping into a pool of other old fart collectors, but that is far from the case. Oh, there are other older dealers but they are not stuffy at all, they are quite interesting. By far though, the majority are younger, and hipper, and we are expanding our knowledge daily about mid century modern collectibles. While I don't want to personally own any of the objects of that era because I lived it once already, I have no trouble at all buying and selling those objects.

So we're looking forward to continuing the mall adventure.

In March I had another birthday.

At 61, I admit that occasionally I gaze on the young with a little envy and more than a little sadness because I realize that that part of my life is over. I will never be able to experience that feeling of being young again, with a future of endless possibility before me. Or feel again that sense of invulnerability that goes with youth. My future is still before me, of course, only it's much shorter now, and I am constantly reminded that it is actually no longer true that anything is possible, and I do regret some things not done. My body does not fail to tell me very loudly and clearly every day that it is not going to last forever.

But, you'll not hear me agonizing all that much about the passing years, for I am grateful to have a birthday each year. It means I'm not dead yet. Right now I can hardly wait to be 65 or 66 because that will mean I can qualify for Medicare and maybe get my knee and whatever else is broken fixed without the major hassle of going through the public health system.

Yet, I've not let a little thing like age deter me entirely from exploring new things.

A few of years ago I became interested in book repair (see above-- we own lots of old books many of which need repair). As a result of learning repair, I developed a workshop teaching a particular skill. So in June, I taught my workshop in Oregon. Once again, it was well received and although I do nothing but complain and have anxiety attacks before each and every workshop, I actually leap into the actual workshop with much enthusiasm and end up loving it and coming away with a great high afterwards. Those adrenaline highs are hard to beat, really. This time I also happened to overhear a group of my students talking about what a great workshop it was and that was such an ego boost. So I guess I will keep doing this until they get bored with me.

The bonus was that I got to see my son and daughter in law in Seattle, and then visit with two good friends of mine who moved to Portland a number of years ago. It was great to to know that we could pick up from where we left off, and know that we would always be friends.

Oops! How coud I forget? We adopted our cat in April.

Also last August an old jewelry account came back and placed a huge order. They had previously been my best customer, and I was really unhappy when they decided to stop carrying my jewelry aabout 8 years ago. But I guess there were personnel changes, discussions and rethinking and they decided they wanted my things again. It must have been a good decision for them because I just got another large order the other day. For me, it's a love hate thing. I love the account and I am very happy to have the money, but I have been making this item for so very long that I must have made thousands, and thousands, or at least it feels like that. And again, it's about the old body. The shoulder is giving out a little now, and there's a tendency to tendinitis when I over do. I'll make ‘em as long as I can, though.

The worst aspect of last year has been dealing with losing yet another friend to the lure of the West Coast. I am somewhat devastated by the thought of my friend's impending move. But I also realize that all will not be lost when she moves to Sacramento. We will be able to maintain our friendship through e-mail and phone calls and I'll just have to see if I can find a place to teach a workshop nearby. Heh.

The happiest possible news for the new year, I've saved for last. Although I'm almost afraid to say it. My daughter is pregnant and the baby is due in June. I am so ready to be a gramma again. I am very good at that, and it's totally age appropriate for me.

2006? Bring it on. I’m ready.

Happy New Year!

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